January 31st, 2010

Interpersonal Expertise Tip: Engaging in Shared Interests

by Dr. Brian Higley

Being able to find common interests is often a big key to successful and satisfying relationships.  It seems simple enough, but often times we get lost in all of the things that make us different - and can easily lose sight of interests that can bind us together.  This Interpersonal Expertise Tip focuses on learning how to identify common interests within our important personal and professional relationships, and how to put those common interests to work to strengthen our bonds with others.

Engaging in shared interests begins with the identification of what all parties genuinely enjoy doing and is strengthened by the commitment to participate in some of these interests together from time to time.  Here are some ways people have been able to strengthen their relationships through their common interests: Read the rest of this Article »

January 30th, 2010

Interpersonal Expertise Tip: Collective Rejuvenating Via Genuine Relaxation and Fun

by Dr. Brian Higley

We live in a society that often encourages an “all work and no play” mentality, which often leaves both our personal and professional relationships neglected and stagnant.  So often, our relationships begin with a focus on enhancing each others’ enjoyment of  life and/or work only to “devolve” into ruts and routines.  This Interpersonal Expertise Tip focuses on how to set aside enough time and energy to energize our relationships - and rediscover the excitement and energy that brought us together in the first place.

Collective rejuvenation can be facilitated by committing to providing all parties with opportunities to experience genuine (not forced or faked) relaxation and fun.  We are not talking about get-togethers that only some people truly enjoy; everyone knows that some people only pretend to have fun at certain office parties or family reunions while others are genuinely enjoying themselves out of fear of punishment or rejection.  We are talking about experiences that allow everyone the chance to truly unwind and/or experience genuine “belly laugh” fun.  Here are some ways people have been able to promote collective rejuvenation: Read the rest of this Article »

January 14th, 2010

Self-Mastery Tip: Enhance Your Awareness/Attention/”Mindfulness”

by Dr. Brian Higley

Being more aware of what is happening within oneself, others and the surrounding environment can have a great impact on Self-Mastery.  The more you know about what influences you and how it does so, the more influence you will gain over your own thoughts, feelings and behaviors.  Blocks to personal and professional growth are much easier to overcome when we experience more awareness of ourselves, others and the environments in which we live and work.

There are many ways in which to enhance awareness, including the following: Read the rest of this Article »

January 13th, 2010

Self-Mastery Tip: Cultivate Your Peace of Mind

by Dr. Brian Higley

There are many conflicts that most of us encounter in our daily lives; some are unavoidable, others are quickly resolved when we are in more clear states of mind.  Many have reported that when in calm states of mind, conflicts that used to seem very large or important fade away, leaving people with much more energy and focus for important personal and professional goals.  There are many methods of cultivating more peaceful states of mind, even in the midst of challenging situations and times.  Here are a few ideas that have helped many people do so: Read the rest of this Article »

January 12th, 2010

Self-Mastery Tip: Optimizing Self-Esteem

by Dr. Brian Higley

Experiencing the extremes of low self-esteem (sometimes referred to as “self-doubt”) and over-blown self-esteem (sometime referred to as “arrogant pride”) can decrease our ability to relate to ourselves, others and our environment in realistic, effective and satisfying ways.  The more we can dwell in between these extremes (sometimes thought about as a state of self-confidence mixed with awareness of one’s limitations), the more influence we have over our thoughts, feelings and behaviors.

Optimized self-esteem is often brought about by affirming our strengths (without overestimating them) while simultaneously understanding our weaknesses (without allowing our awareness of weaknesses to influence us to underestimate our worth as people).  Here are some methods people have used to promote a balance between self-doubt and arrogant pride: Read the rest of this Article »