Self-Mastery Tip: Optimizing Self-Esteem

by Dr. Brian Higley

January 12th, 2010

Experiencing the extremes of low self-esteem (sometimes referred to as “self-doubt”) and over-blown self-esteem (sometime referred to as “arrogant pride”) can decrease our ability to relate to ourselves, others and our environment in realistic, effective and satisfying ways.  The more we can dwell in between these extremes, the more influence we have over our thoughts, feelings and behaviors.

Optimized self-esteem is brought about by affirming our strengths without overestimating them while understanding our weaknesses without underestimating our worth.  Here are some ways people are able to strike a balance between self-doubt and arrogant pride:

• To help balance out self-doubt, get in touch with your “Fueling Forces.” Fueling Forces are activities, places or people that help you feel physically and/or emotionally stronger.  It can be helpful to identify what fuels you and goal-set to be around these forces more frequently.
• To help balance out arrogant pride, become more aware of your weaknesses and embrace them. Imperfections are often what help ground us and connect us to others.  It can be useful to identify 3-5 areas of weakness in ourselves in order to stay aware that we are not perfect (like everyone else).
• To stay balanced: Stay aware of areas of strength and areas of imperfection and affirm both regularly. It can be helpful to keep a list of areas where we are strong and areas where we have significant limitations.  These lists are likely to change over time (and with attention and training), but the balance between self-doubt and arrogant pride doesn’t have to.  There will always be areas where we are strong and areas where we do not excel.  Staying aware of that fact can help optimize self-esteem and keep us grounded in reality (and connected to ourselves and others, too).

NOTE TO THOSE USING THE MISSION FULFILLMENT SYSTEM: You can work toward optimizing your self-esteem by adding a new Objective to your system by using the “Add New Item” link (for example, “Optimize my self-esteem”).  You can then develop a SMART Goal related to that new Objective by using the “Add Subitem” link to the far right of the new Objective (for example, “Make a list of my strengths and limitations and reflect on it weekly.”).

FOR THOSE WHO ARE NOT ON THE MISSION FULFILLMENT SYSTEM: Click here to for more information and click here to sign up.

FINAL NOTE: If you were linked to this article by a video or email, please return to that link and proceed with any other instructions that you deem helpful.  For more Execution Excellence tips and tools visit our site at: www.excellencetree.com

Article Filed under: Self-Mastery Tips